There is an interesting paradox involved when being a stay at home mom of four wonderful but crazy children. You have absolutely no time (or brain cells) to think about anything worthwhile, and yet you have much too much time to spend thinking while you can’t do anything else. I can’t sit down and write a budget on my laptop for fear that my toddler will climb on top of my keyboard and destroy it, so I’m left to walk around the house able to do little else but hold one or two squirming children and let my mind wander.

Our minds walk a treacherous path. Wandering about the house calming the teething toddler I notice shelves that are unorganized, paint colors that looked a lot better on the paint chip and DIY projects that aren’t doing themselves. My list of things I wanted to accomplish just keeps getting bigger and my mind just keeps getting heavier.

If only I could finish painting the kitchen ceiling after starting it 3 months ago, then I’d feel fulfilled. If only I could get out of the house for an hour and go for a run or read at a coffee shop, then I’d be content and joyful and patient with my kids again. If only my kids would sleep then I could wake up early and plan my day and write and read and drink coffee in peace and oh yeah, use the bathroom alone.

I have found every one of those excuses running through my head countless times, I’m sure you have hundreds of your own you could add. Why is it that we spend hours dreaming up ideal moments that we just know would make everything perfect? We chase perfection and contentment around like it’s a goal to be obtained or a mark to reach. 

Do you know what? I’ve had all those scenarios fulfilled at one point or another. I finally finished painting the kitchen ceiling a few weeks ago. Sure, it felt good to look at a job finally done, but it didn’t make me content. The next day I just thought of another project that I really should finish. I’ve had times where I have gotten away by myself and it’s all great and everything, but sometimes it’s a huge letdown when you get back home and realize you’re no happier than you were when you left. 

In our life we will always have goals and projects and things we want to do because they pave the way to a better life and happiness, but if we make the fulfillment of those things the source of our contentment then we will be left empty and frustrated.

Contentment is something that cannot be chased. No matter how fast or hard we pursue it, it will always elude our grasp. The only way to catch happiness is to stop, reach out and grab it, right where we are. 

Turn off that screen, turn off the rolling to-do list in your mind and stop. Instead of cleaning the kitchen and making a mental list of all the things you would change or don’t like about it, thank God that you have a kitchen. Thank God that you have running water, food in the cupboard, and a roof over your head. Make it a habit to be thankful, and write it down. I dare you, every time you think something negative to find something to be thankful for instead.

Let your mind be filled with gratefulness and suddenly you realize that you really are content right where you are.